Dear Journal,
Making friends is weird.
I remember teaching my daughter how to make friends at the playground.
“Just say hi, tell them your name, and ask if they wanna play.”
And it always worked.
Two seconds later she’d be running off with her new friend, and I’d be standing there like, damn. That was easy.
Meanwhile, I can have a whole conversation with a woman I like and go home wondering if it would’ve been weird to ask for her number.
When did we get so worried about letting somebody we want to connect with know how we feel?
My daughter wanted somebody to play with, so she asked.
I want more close girlfriends, and apparently I need three more run-ins and a sign from God.
I find it crazy that so many of us want the same thing and still struggle to connect when the opportunity comes.
Past hurt, fear of rejection, idk.
I know some of it is life.
I wish I had more close friends, but some days I barely have the capacity to keep up with the people I already love.
I’ll answer a text in my head and then, three days later, wonder why she never responded.
Well, Teresa. You never sent it.
My best friend lives 1,078 miles away.
I wish she was a short drive away so we could pop up at each other’s homes like we use to.
Go on dinner dates, or squeeze in a movie where the kids interrupted every five minutes.
I miss being able to call her and say, “What are you doing? I’m coming over,” and actually show up.
I want girlfriends who get where I am in life without me having to explain certain things.
Girl, come over.
Let’s put on a movie and talk about bullshit.
Let the kids tear each other apart over the same toy while we sip wine in the living room and yell “SHARE” without getting up.
You know?!
I keep thinking about my daughter at the playground.
She only needed to know if somebody wanted to play right then.
I think I could let a first hangout be that simple, too.
We can have a good time, and I can share more of myself as I get to know her.
So maybe my grown-up version of “Do you wanna play?” is “Girl, what are you doing Saturday? Bring the kids.”
Anyways, 1,078 miles is crazy. The audacity!
Teresa ♡
